Stories

Page 3

• Post 2014

  This is a current/ongoing example of scouts poor child protection and safeguarding abilities in 2023 and their desire to sweep things under the rug and pretend it’s not happening while putting other children at risk

  Four weeks ago our son age 12 was sexually assaulted but another 12 year old boy. While in the hall at the start of scouts, he was talking to two friends when another scout (also 12) came over, physically turned him around to face the wall, said “I’m going to finger you” while pushing his fingers into his bottom. My son’s friend commented to the boy that this was disgusting. My son’s bottom hurt all evening but the leaders did not see the incident and he didn’t tell them. He told me and my husband when he got home.

  I informed the scout leader immediately that evening via email. I also informed the police the following day. At first the response was good. Scouts referred to their safeguarding team in London and the police offered counselling and made arrangements to visit. But since then it has been nothing but victim blaming, minimising and poor practice. It is now 4, weeks post the assault and the police have still failed to visit the perpetrator.

  Scouts safeguarding said they would follow the police lead. All my son wants is to return to scouts (because he has nice friends there) but scouts have said although the boy won’t be there while the incident is investigated they can’t guarantee he will never be allowed to return. Following the police visiting my son it became clear the boy had displayed highly sexualised behaviours at scouts on several occasions and to many children. Touching them and talking about pornography and specific sexual acts. When I emailed the leader to suggest we hold a meeting with other parents to inform them what has happened and give them the opportunity to establish if their child has been effected it was met with silence/no response.

  The next time the scouts met following the assault I was told by the safe guarding lead that it was safe for my son to attend as the boy has been told not to attend but that the only leader who knows about the incident would not be attending that evening. How is that safe?? And why had the other leaders not been told what had occured? How can they keep other children safe if they aren’t information sharing which is the principle of safeguarding??

  In a bid to keep other children safe my husband and I attended the scouts session and spoke to parents in the car park (away from their children) to inform them an incident had occured and provide them with the incident number from the police incase their child had been affected or seen anything. The parents were so supportive and shocked scouts had not informed them. I returned at the end of the session to speak to the other three leaders who had not been informed. When I got there and asked the three grown men for a quiet word the village ‘head of scouts’ was there and practically pushed myself and my husband into a kitchen, shutting all the doors and hatches telling us we can’t speak about it or tell them what has happened!! In her attempt to silence us she admitted to not having a great knowledge of safe guarding, expressed worry for her position in scouting as she is “the face of scouts in the village” and worried that now I had told other parents she and the other leaders would face questions! Further to this she attempted to shift responsibility by suggesting the incident happened in the cloak room (which it didn’t) not in the main hall and that the scouts aren’t responsible for the young people until they are in the main hall. This is something that has never been communicated but none the less is not true.

  As a result of my safe guarding action where the police and scouting failed another witness came forward. This angered the police who (week three after the incident still hadn’t done anything except spoken to my son). They also couldn’t offer counselling as they said because of my son’s age and the sexual nature of the crime the service they referred to wouldn’t take him. They made it clear they wouldn’t arrest the boy at it would be ‘too traumatic’ for him to go to custody and when I questioned this made attempts to intimidate us by asking “how I would feel if the boy made a counter claim and they came and arrested my son.”

  When I asked about the support we would need once they spoke to the perpetrator and his family, fearing reprisals the police told me they could remove police support if I was worried about this!

  Police told us scouts had referred us to social care. Then yesterday I had a call from a social worker who was disgusted to have only received the referral two days ago (three and a half weeks after the incident). And the referral had come from police not scouts. It then came to light that the police had failed to complete the referral correctly as they didn’t ask my husband’s date of birth which is required for referral until three weeks into the ‘investigation’.

  It is four weeks on now and the police have not been to see two witnesses or the perpetrator. Scouts are still unable to reassure me the boy won’t return to scouts as they are awaiting the police investigation, which we have told them there will be no significant outcome from as they won’t bring criminal action or even interview him due to his age. The local leaders who are ment to ‘look after’ my son and care for him as a member of their scouting community have made no attempt to support my son or ask how he is. Even as a human being, even if you feel you can’t talk about the incident as it’s being investigated you could show the young person and their family that you care about what they are going through.

  The sexual intention of this boys action is clear. There is no grey area here but clearly scouts thinks it is reasonable. Their lack of ability to safeguard other children is what I find most shocking. What other information is scout safeguarding ‘sitting’ on without informing parents and other agencies? It is in these shadows if inaction and silence that perpetrators of these crimes against children are allowed to hide and flourish.

  Although my son is desperate to return I honestly don’t think the scouts organisations safeguarding is fit for purpose. But as the victim of sexual assult my son should not be the one to leave the organisation. Furthermore I will ensure that boy is not allowed back for the sake of the other children. I can’t believe that as it stands they are telling me and my son there is a chance he will have to be in the same room as his perpetrator?! What world do they live in?? I will never leave my son unattended with any member of scouting ever again as they are incompetent as an organisation and are more interested in their reputation as an association than keeping young people safe. Their safeguarding procedures seem to be hide everything, don’t talk about anything and stop the victims and their parent speaking. I can’t believe we are in 2023 and this is still the case!
• Emotional Abuse

  I briefly joined the scouts for 2 years to take part in a DOFE program and almost as soon as i joined a boy started bullying me simply because he could.The leader who was in charge of the program was fully aware of this and actively watched it happen.

  At the time i didnt want to say anything to him because i was scared of him and thought reporting jt would make it worse.

  On the Expedition i was in a group with him. I had to spend many hours a day in a boat with him and he made my life a living hell for thoes days. The leader also witnessed this and did nothing.

  To this day i havent went back to scouts or DOFE he ruined it for me and i hate him for it.
• Sexual Abuse

  I wasn’t in scouts but I was in girl guides. However we did go to camps where we would be sharing the site with others, sometimes other guides and sometimes scouts. We were on a camp with a few other groups there, I can’t remember how many but most of them were scouts. I remember one of the scout leaders chatting to our guide leader asking if anyone wanted to do flags in the morning just normal chat and I was standing with her. He asked my name and age. I told him I was 11 and he made a comment about how young I looked for my age. This wasn’t abnormal everyone said it because I looked significantly younger than all the others in our group. we went to bed and i remember waking up and needing to go to the toilet. The toilets were at the other side of the site so I got up and put my wellies on and walked over. I entered the bathroom and I had been followed in. I just remember being pushed and held down against the sinks. I don’t know how long it lasted but it probably was a lot shorter than i remember. He told me if I told me that it was my fault for walking in the dark at night on my own and I should have brought someone with me. I walked back to the tent and got into my sleeping bag and I was in so much pain and felt so ill. I don’t remember sleeping but in the morning I didn’t want to get out of the tent. My leader came to speak to me and when she got me out of my sleeping bag she thought I had started my period because of the blood on my pyjamas. I didn’t know her very well because I had just moved up to this guides from brownies and I just didn’t say anything. The scouts left the camp site before us and I just felt numb the rest of the time. I moved to a different guide group after to the leaders that ran my brownies I was close with. I didn’t want to go to camps were we were with other groups and I hated wearing the uniform.
• Sexual Abuse

  This is a hard story to tell, from when I was an Explorer between 2006 and 2008.
  I was aged between 16 and 18 at the time and the leader was in their early 30s.

  There was no Facebook or Instagram back then, MySpace was what eveyone was on – but MSN messaging was still king. You would log on each evening on the shared family computer and chat to your friends from school, or like me, Explorers. Many of us had our Explorer leader on chat too – and we didn’t think anything strange of it.

  But I, like othersin my unit was groomed by the leader.

  At the time I was sexually assaulted in 2008 I had turned 18. I felt at the time and for a long time after that it was a mistake that I had made. Due to the technicality I was ‘over 18’ I thought it was something he was allowed to do and that it wasn’t something I could report.

  How did it start? From the age of 16 I used to attend weekly kayaking pool sessions which were additional to the regular Explorer Night. We used the local pool but Scouts were the only people there. Adults and young people would share communal changing rooms, – and this leader would find satisfaction in banter and body shaming young people.

  To this day I am not sure why but our parents would often drop us off at his house so we could help load up and transport group kit from his garage. Coming from a Scouting family it was just accepted this was an OK thing to do, but several male members of our unit were being groomed. I don’t fully know the extent as we don’t even talk about it anymore.

  I was sexually assaulted once in the back of his range rover style car as after turning 18 as that’s where he told us would be sleeping as we were not allowed to share the accommodation building with the under 18s. There were 4 of us sleeping in the car and I woke up to find him with his hands down my trousers. I got out of the car at 5am and hid in the toilets until eveyone else got up for breakfast.

  I was assaulted a few years later after a night out back in our home town which ended up back at their house.

  This leader is no longer involved in Scouting, I don’t know the circumstances they left in as people don’t talk about it and it didn’t involve me, and I had moved away for University.

  This leader was insecure with their own sexuality and would prey on the sexuality of gay young people who were not out to their parents and used this to manipulate them.
• Post 2014

  I have been a leader for 30 years. I have seen attitudes change, and practices considered normal 30 years ago are nowadays, quite rightly, frowned upon.

  I reported a Leader through the Scout Safeguarding process, I specifically requested that they made sure a certain Police Officer was not part of the investigation. The day after I made the complaint, the subject called me out for making the complaint. Nothing happened. He still involved, and I am aware of other accusations made against him.

  I had an issue with a Scout with a mental health issue. We were abroad at the time. I followed the Scout Association procedure to the letter. On returning home, I found that I had to speak to one of the parents as there had been no contact from Social Services, and the subject could/ should not have gone back home without his mother being aware of the issue.

  I have since made a couple of reports, and I would say to anyone in Scouts or Guides, if you have any concerns about the safeguarding of a child at the hands of a Leader, make your complaint through the NSPCC, do not use the Scout process.

  The Scout Safeguarding system can be misused, and Leaders can and do close ranks because no one wants to think of their friend as an abuser.

  When I left Scouts, I was inundated with messages from other leaders who had been subject to bullying and intimidation. My message to anyone is that bullying and intimidation and any form of abuse have no place in society, never mind Scouts.
• Sexual Abuse

  In cubs in the mid-70s there was a regular outing by train to a seaside resort on the south coast. In those days trains had individual compartments, and our group of perhaps 6 to 8 boys was in one with our akela. We played a game where when you made a mistake you had to lay across his lap and have your bottom smacked with a slipper. At the same time he would grab and squeeze your testicles.
• Sexual Abuse

  I went from cubs to scouts and aged about 11 enrolled for my first aid badge. Me and another scout arrived at the equipment storage area where the scoutmaster asked me to remove my trousers and underwear. He then proceeded to put a bandage around the top of my leg close to my groin. I was mortified especially as the girl guides were meeting in the attached hall with no obvious lock on the door and some could have come in at anytime for equipment which, maybe, our Skip was hoping for..
• Sexual Abuse

  I remember several of us Scouts being invited into the kit storeroom by an Assistant Scout Leader (in the mid-1960s). Once we were in there he closed the door and revealed his penis and testicles, inviting us to touch them. We were all severely taken aback and frightened, so we made a rapid exit. There was no follow up. Later I learnt that this ASL had written letters to several of the individual Scouts. He had then very rapidly thought better of this move and persuaded the Scout Leader to drive him to the homes of those Scouts so he could retrieve the letters before they were opened. I don’t know what the content of the letters was. Later this ASL tried to take his own life, failed, and later went on to study at university.
• Post 2014

  I was a scout between 2010 and 2014, in 2011 I went on a scout trip to Europe, on that trip if we got in trouble they would take the money we had been given to us by our parents/ guardians, and they would dock it.

  I remember being accused of lying by this one scout leader, they deducted money from me despite no evidence i had lied. It was a combined trip between us and another scout group, the leader of the other scout group was particularly horrible. I was 11 years old at the time, from my memory we were called Bitches by a scout leader and bullying from older kids wasn’t taken seriously. When myself and two friends got left in a shop in a city we didn’t know, we got in trouble for staying at the shop and not trying to go find the group, and money was deducted from us. I remember complaining of being made to do the washing up more than the older boys and us being told off for complaining and made to wash up in the dark late in to the night. My memory is hazy but I remember older kids bullying us and nothing being done , scout leaders joining in calling us cry babies.

  There was definite favouritism to the older boys. I remember going up a mountain in the mini van with like 3 people on one chair. I remember rumours about sexist and racist language being used by leaders.

  This was an ongoing theme through out my experience of scouts, I remember being told that I couldn’t be a patrol leader cos they already had one “girl” leader. I remember cruel games to trick us and a kid being made to run around a field in the middle of the night because they were being noisy. I remember bullying and sexual harrasment from other scouts and little education or support.. I remember being told off by scout leaders for wearing too short shorts and being told that if we dressed certain way it make us sluts.
• Sexual Abuse

  I joined the scouts at 11 years old, quickly I developed a friendship with one of the group leaders. Over the years he nurtured this friendship, talking to me most evenings on social media, texting and picking me for ‘special projects’ he encouraged me to become a young leader so we were able to see each other more often. By 15 (Around 2010) we were in a full relationship, though only a handful of people knew (no adults in scouting had been informed) however leaders regularly left us both alone in the scout premises, or arrived to groups and seeing that both of us had been there for a while before their arrival – would say nothing and not question it.

  Despite my age and being a young leader, leaders would often regard how close we were yet not challenge or question his behaviour or why we were so close, we would travel together to events, leaders would leave us both to stay up late on camps despite knowing it was just the two of us. I believe that because of this negligence he was able to start a sexual relationship with me. With all sexual conduct happening on scout premises and grounds.

  At 16 I ended the relationship and quickly became uncomfortable by his presence, leaders and friends noticed my change in behaviour towards him and noticed I was visibly uncomfortable by his presence. One leader contacted me on social media and questioned why I was so uncomfortable, I decided to tell this leader about the relationship and what had happened in person. I also explained that I was concerned he was grooming another young person now. This leader said they would deal with it but didn’t tell me what they would do, months later nothing had changed, and I found out that the leader I had reported it too was also dating a 15 year old boy and his friends/family who were also scout leaders were all aware. I suspect this is why he protected him.

  Five years later, as an adult, I realised how inappropriate the relationship had been, the negligence from other leaders and decided to lodge a complaint with the Scout Association. After notifying them of the instances that had occurred and that the leader was still working as a cub leader, I was told they wouldn’t do anything unless I reported it to the Police. After reporting it to the police the scout association continued to refuse to do anything. After asking for assistance from a county scout leader, who took the issue seriously, I was told my The Scout Associations safeguarding team that the leader would be put in front of a panel of scout leaders and they would likely side with him (denying what happened) so suggested I dropped the accusations. Eventually I sent conclusive evidence (images, screenshots) of the relationship and due to pressure from the county leader I had involved, they interviewed the leader and suggested he resigned. The safeguarding officer contacted me to notify me that he and his family were incredibly upset and was I sure I wanted to continue. I insisted they continued, but instead of removing him they suggested he resigned, which he did.

  I asked for support with counselling after the process, which had taken around 6 months and been mentally challenging, and was told this was not possible and to speak to my GP.

  The entire process was re-traumatising, I wasn’t listened to and the matter was not taken seriously.

  On reflection of my time in scouting, other than this incident I was personally aware of almost 10 inappropriate relationships (over 18’s grooming and having relationships with under 16’s) and was involved in five other instances with leaders sending me and friends inappropriate images, messages e.t.c. For these reasons I believe their is a systemic issue within scouting.